Developing A Cat-Like Instinct for Relationships

If you’re a regular reader of the Bennis Inc Blog you’ll surely recall my “personal assistant” Pinot. For those of you who may still be catching up or just stopping by, allow me to explain that this fur ball of personality doubles as my work partner on most days, but most simply (and reasonably) stated she’s our family pet. During the day, Pinot and I do a good job of keeping to our respective tasks at hand so long as what I’m do appears uninteresting and her food dish is full. But as soon as she decides I can offer her anything of benefit – a warm lap, fresh water or source of entertainment – she gives me her undivided attention. This animal-to-human dynamic she and I share is not far removed from the dynamics I share with other people in my life. Whether I’m the cat or human in these particular scenarios is debatable, but I’ve realized that when it comes to relationships, there’s a great deal of similarity to be found between us and our feline friends. I believe this can be best summarized by David Fisher’s quote:

“The golden rule of cats that governs all relationships we have with people: you scratch my back, you scratch my back.”

I would be shocked if you could not think of one instance in which this feline relationship principle held true. Business partnerships, interactions with strangers, close friendships and marriages all require some degree of “back scratching” and let’s be honest, it sure feels better to be on the receiving end. As much as we’d like to convince ourselves that we are always selfless and fair, the truth is that some of our most fulfilling relationships with others are the result of a cat-like instinct to look out for Number One. And surprisingly, that’s OK. In fact it’s this instinct that ultimately protects our business, our happiness and our time.

First thinking about my business, I’m very cat-like in that I want to share mutually beneficial work relationships with any client I take on. Though I’m the one providing them with a service, and they will and should benefit, I too want to benefit. I want this to turn into a satisfied client that turns into a recommendation that turns into potentially more work. I want a client who shares my vision for their business and is as passionate about bringing it to reality as I am. In friendships, I want to invest my time with people who are positive, happy and inspiring because this has such a profound impact on my own mood. And with strangers or new acquaintances, I want an interaction that holds the promise of a future client, friend or both. When all piled together, these seem like quite a greedy request of my relationships. But consider this: the more we work to surround ourselves with beneficial relationships, the more beneficial we also become to those with whom we interact.

So long as we maintain a genuine effort to share the happiness and success we build for ourselves, there is no guilt in seeking out that next “back scratching.“

I don’t anticipate receiving a reciprocal tummy rub from Pinot anytime soon, yet our relationship works because I too am benefiting in my own way. She’s my stress relief, companion and certainly introduces and element of entertainment and surprise into our household. To apply this to the relationships in your life, don’t ever feel guilty for enjoying or benefiting from the interactions you have with people. It’s most likely that you’re also providing enjoyment or a benefit to them as well. So as long as Pinot keeps coming around for her daily back scratches and I keep providing them, I know that we’re mutually happy and that we each feel like we’re getting the better end of this deal.

 

Fear Factor: Why this emotion is necessary for success

The inspiration for this week’s blog post comes from one of the world’s best-known thinkers who I happen to find absolutely fascinating—Plato. He’s credited with this wisdom, “Courage is knowing what not to fear.” Like most philosophies or proverbs, they’re simply stated, but the endless possibilities of meanings and applications run much deeper. I liked this quote from the first time I heard it, but now as a business owner and entrepreneur, every quote I see or re-read seems to also be applicable to business and success in some way. This one is no exception.

I wrote not too long ago about fear and inspiration as being the two ultimate motivators. In this breakdown I examined how each motivator results in very different types of actions. What this topic did not allow me to expand upon is how fear, though not the preferred motivator, is still an essential part of success. We should never be without at least some fear in our lives for the same reason we should never be without pain. These are the emotional and physical indicators that we’re doing something that’s stretching our limits – it can be a good feeling when it’s that of growth. Once we move outside of this “good growth” area of pain and fear, they then become the indicators that we shouldn’t go any further. This is what keeps us from destroying ourselves (or our business or our relationships). Thus, the goal shouldn’t be to overcome every fear; it should be to overcome the unnecessary fears.

When NOT to fear

“Courage is knowing what not to fear.” But how do we know what is fear-worthy and what we should push to overcome? This differentiation might be the most critical component to ensuring we’re exhausting our options and not ourselves. Unfortunately, Plato didn’t go on to further describe how we might know what to fear; he left that for us to figure out on our own. During my experience of quitting my job, taking a chance on starting a new business and overcoming the expected ups and downs of entrepreneurship along the way, I’ve had to face quite a few of my own fears. In the beginning I feared losing any client or getting turned down for any project. I’ve since realized that this is something I should not and cannot fear if I wish to excel in this industry. The possibility for rejection and change are around every corner, but this does not stop me from continuing to seek new clients and put my hat in the ring for proposals. The fact is, if I got every client I created a proposal for and kept them ongoing, I would be very overwhelmed and my business would not have the same opportunity to re-evaluate and refocus its client base every so often. That same rejection and change that I once feared is now my natural business cleansing process that I’ve come to appreciate. In this example, I found courage not by eliminating this fear or avoiding it, but by learning that it’s something I should not fear at all.

 When to fear

In contrast to knowing when not to fear, it’s just as important to know when a fear is reasonable, logical and a valuable safety mechanism. Again to provide an example from my own experience, I’ve become very in tune to the fear of sacrificing my standards or quality of work to accommodate a client. When business is slow and you’re looking to just pay the bills, it’s a natural instinct to go into survival mode. It’s OK to work for reduced rates or take on less than ideal clients for a short period of time to help pay the bills until your business is again revived. But fear rises up whenever I feel as though I’m lowering my standards or providing sub-par work to meet these reduced prices. I would rather turn away a client if it’s not a good fit than to squeeze and stretch to make it work and have us both be supremely dissatisfied in the end. In this case, my fear helps me to protect my personal reputation and to stay focused on the direction I want my business to go. It keeps me from digressing into offering services more aligned with a personal assistant or data entry and to protect my time for future clients that require the PR services in which I specialize.

Being courageous

I would like to believe that “courageous” is a term that has become synonymous with “entrepreneur.” It’s no easy feat to go against the grain, open your own business and pursue your dreams. It’s hard to watch peers continue down a path that’s well-beaten and easy to see miles into the future. Entrepreneurs don’t get that. We blaze our own path and often have the scars and exhaustion to show for it. But this is all with the hope that the path we choose to follow leads us on a better journey – a journey we control and can change at any moment. Ultimately, this takes courage and because “courage is knowing what not to fear,” we have to make the effort to look within and separate true fear from perceived or imagined fear. This is a critical step in both personal and business development. So, get to know your fears – intimately – especially the ones that can become your moral compass and business instinct.

 

Fear or Inspiration: The Two Motivators That Makes Us Move

We see it in the news, read it in a magazine or hear it within our networks almost every day. There’s some new start-up that’s growing exponentially and breaking all kinds of projections. They’re on the fast track to becoming the “next big thing.” It’s enough to make any small business owner or entrepreneur want to throw the old adage of “slow and steady wins the race” out the window.  Who wouldn’t want their business to skyrocket to Facebook-like fame? From my own experiences and observations, I’ve found that for any business that’s progressing and expanding at warp speed, there is most commonly one of two causes for this type of growth. The differences between these causes are paramount to the ultimate success – or implosion – of the business.

Most simply defined, the two motivators for momentum are fear and inspiration. For most businesses, it’s easy to pick out which they’re experiencing. The difference can be seen in whether their actions to accommodate this growth are proactive or reactive. Not all speeds of growth are beneficial if it comes at the risk of ruining your business or losing your sanity.  The ultimate goal for any business experiencing a period of growth should be to run like you’re crossing the finish line, not like you’re being chased.

Running Scared

Especially seen in start-ups, where one good viral marketing campaign can create an insatiable consumer demand almost overnight, the momentum of business growth can make you run like you’re being chased. You’re reactionary. There’s no time to create a sensible growth plan when you’re barely able to keep up with the current demands of the business. You’re not running the business, the business is running you – or after you, rather. Sure it’s momentum and to the outside world it appears that you’re making significant progress, but in reality you’re shooting from the hip with every decision. My political experience has provided me with far too many examples of organizations who function out of fear. Jokingly we called it organized chaos, but this reactionary behavior to everything thrown at us resulted in frequent mistakes and missed opportunities. In retrospect, these situations would have greatly benefited from even just an hour or two of critical planning. This small investment of time in the short term would have given us a more proactive plan to turn to in the long term. For any business or organization that appears to be “running scared,” it’s never too late to pump the breaks and replace this fear with strategy.

Running Toward A Goal

In contrast to the first type of motivator – fear, the motivator of inspiration produces quite a different result within a business. To the outside world movement all appears the same, but inside you can clearly tell a business that functions off of a well thought out growth strategy. Unlike running scared, running toward a goal helps you to make even big decisions with less effort. Your strategy – or finish line – helps you to see the obvious answers. You’re calm, confident and collected because your focus is on anticipating the next step not reacting to the last hurdle. The inspired movers are the business owners who are able to appreciate the growth of their business, not come to curse it. Most importantly, when you have inspiration as your motivator, not fear, you are in complete control of the direction of growth. You’re able to pick and choose the opportunities that best align with your goals. When motivated by fear, you’re more likely to take on every opportunity that comes your way regardless of whether it’s the right fit. I once had someone give me the advice, “Pile as much on your plate as you can. You can always take it off later, but you can’t put it back on.” I was hesitant when I first heard this and have since learned that it’s very bad advice. Be strategic with your opportunities and don’t give into the fear that tells you another one may never come your way – with enough talent and inspiration, they always do!

In thinking about your own business – or even your personal life – which type of growth do you most familiarize yourself with? Are you running scared or are you running toward a goal? There’s no questioning the accuracy of the term “growing pains.” Growth means change and change is often uncomfortable. What’s important to remember is that between the two motivators that make us move – fear and inspiration – one drains us while the other fulfills us.  It’s important to seek out the latter to ensure that even during the most uncomfortable periods of growth that require us to stretch our limits, we have a finish line in sight and a strategy to get there feeling like a champion.

 

The Power of Habit–And Making Your Bed (Guest Blog by Todd Shirley)

This week’s post comes from returning guest blogger, Todd Shirley. Todd is a talented writer with a wealth of knowledge to share. I hope you are inspired to leave a comment or engage in conversation after reading this post. To learn more about Todd, please visit his biography at the end and check out his blog here.

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The Power of Habit–And Making Your Bed

I have a habit of talking to myself. It has lead to some embarrassing situations. One time at a job I worked in high school, co workers, customers, and my bosses stopped business briefly to share a communal laugh at this habit.  As I cleaned the large windows of the shop, the sun was at my back and reflected onto my eyes. I couldn’t see into the store while everyone could clearly see me wiping the windows and pantomiming an argument I was having inside my head.

As an adult, nothing gets me talking to myself more than when I read a good non-fiction book. In a weird way, I live the facts that I pick up from it.  The Power of Habit: Why we do what we do in life and business by Charles Duhigg is such a book to trigger this habit several times over.  I highly recommend it.

The following three points from the book are my favorite. I have also shared  how they relate to me.

1: Habits are inevitable because our brains RELY on habits:

Nothing makes the brain take up more energy than novel experiences. To move an experience into the realm of a habit offers the brain a tremendous cost savings for its resources.

Consider this point in terms of dialing a new ten digit phone number. I estimate there are over thirty steps involved. Each number has to be recognized, located on the dial pad, and double-checked for accuracy. To dial a familiar number, your brain doesn’t approach it in several steps; it approaches it as one movement of your finger.

In my day to day work I encounter middle schoolers from foreign countries. I’ve heard time and again that their day is eight times more tiring than students who are familiar with the school district, speak English and understand our customs.

2: We operate under the influence of keystone habits:

Keystone habits are habits that dictate other habits.

I struggle all the time to eat breakfast before work.  While reading the book, I decided to begin focusing on making my bed before work instead of preparing breakfast. In doing so, I found out I had more time before work than I realized. This led to frying up some eggs and eating them.  After about the fifth time doing this, I thought I was on to something.  Regularly now I eat breakfast about four times a week but no longer make my bed.

3: Habits don’t go extinct, they get written over:

I haven’t touched a mountain bike in years but feel pretty confident I could hop on one and make my way down the street.  The habits necessary to ride my bike are still there but were written over by habits relevant to driving my car.

The book, The Power of Habit, has many implications for an individual’s life as well as how organizations work.  I found it rewarding and encouraging as it seems to lift the veil of mystery that often covers up human behavior. I hope I’ve piqued your interest by writing about my personal experiences as they relate to this book.

Anyone care to venture a guess about what I do now instead of talking to myself?  Leave a comment with your best idea and I’ll reveal the answer…

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Todd Shirley works full time as a school counselor and carries a caseload of clients who are in the foster care system. When he is not working, he is reading, working out, cooking Paleo and discussing all that is arbitrary about life. Oh-and his favorite animal is the manatee. Todd is an incredible guest blogger with a wealth of knowledge to share. I hope you are inspired to leave a comment, engage in conversation or visit his blog having now read this post. You are always welcome to share your thoughts below!

 

So You’re Different…Just Like Everyone Else

As I continue to define the scope of my Public Relations work – particularly the emerging trends and most effective strategies for my clients, I’ve been confronted with one reoccurring scenario. Every business wants to share the message of why they’re different from all the others. But so often the differences they provide me with read like every other brochure, billboard or tagline I’ve seen time and time again. “We care….We put our customers first…We provide you with the best quality of service.” If you’ve already tuned out while reading that last sentence, you’re not alone. In fact, your reaction is the same reaction such statements receive when they’re placed on any plethora of marketing materials. Either the message is forgotten as soon as something else catches our attention or it’s glazed over altogether, never standing the chance to be absorbed into our subconscious. Neither result is desirable for the businesses who are trying so hard to differentiate themselves.

What makes a business truly different?

Truthfully, at the end of the day…very little. For the most part, products and services can be replicated (even with the best copyright laws and patents in place). There are millions of family-owned businesses with “small town values” representing every size and industry. And words like loyalty, honesty and quality – while all very good things for a business to have – are often read as ambiguous marketing fluff by customers. In very rare cases, a compelling story of how you overcame mountains of adversity to start your business may draw a unique spotlight your way, but inevitably the light will fade and a story of such depth is hard to convey on a billboard or Facebook ad. By focusing your marketing and public relations on answering the question “What makes me different?” you’re missing the question that really matters which is “How can I get remembered?”

Recognize your lack of differences with honesty.

Simply put, people appreciate honesty. The initial and obvious reaction to this fact is to position a company’s honesty and integrity as a “unique value.” But I beg of you to take at least one step outside the box. Customers aren’t easily fooled into thinking that you’re the only honest business on the block. They likely do business with many other people who they would also classify as men or women of integrity. So instead, make yourself memorable by evoking an unexpected emotion or reaction from your audience. With the right communications strategy you can make them laugh, make them think or even make them blush. You may be bold enough to directly say “We’re actually not that different from the other businesses out there,” and catch your audience completely off guard. Being remembered is the end goal and by going against the grain just a little, you’ll have a much better shot at achieving this. So long as you remain honest and genuine with your customer base, the sky’s the limit for creativity!

Actions (and brands) speak louder than words.

Nike is far from the only company that makes and sells athletic apparel. This is a huge industry and really no advertisement or marketing that I’ve seen has fully convinced me that any certain running shoe or t-shirt is all that different from the rest. Even when a seemingly revolutionary product is launched, it’s only a matter of weeks or months until 10+ other companies release their own version of this product, claiming the same technology and benefits. So what does Nike focus on to position themselves as a leader in the industry? Their brand. It’s the swoosh, the “Just do it” tagline, the distinct style of commercials and the carefully chosen celebrity spokespeople who create this solid brand. Instead of contributing to the white noise of long-winded and confusing advertising jargon, Nike has instead chose to build a brand that is so powerful and well-defined that a big white smudge on an all-black billboard is enough for anyone to recognize that as the Nike brand. While they still strive to be “first” and “different” in many aspects of athletic apparel, they know this will only every last so long until the next big thing hits. So instead, they focus their communications efforts on building up what can’t as easily be knocked down – a timeless brand.

You may not be the only one, but you can still be the best one.

Finally, there is one area where you can truly stand out and that’s at the top. By being the best at something, you leave no room for a competitor to join you on this stage. However, in communications the term “the best” is overused, misconstrued and there’s really no form you need to fill out or ribbon you need to receive to make this claim. At all levels and in all industries, there are certain awards that can help back up your claim to fame and provide a great point of differentiation for your business. But regardless of whether you’re hoping to use this title as a future marketing campaign, you should strive to be the best for no greater reason than to serve your people and your business well. There may be many other businesses out there just like yours, but if your customers truly feel like you are the best based on the quality of your service or product, I promise you that they will be back for more!

Whether you’re trying to differentiate your business or yourself, remember that for no other reason than the sheer volume of competitors, being truly different is not always possible. Instead, focus your communications efforts of getting remembered. And with this thought, I’ll close with a final inspiration:

“People will forget what you said. People will forget what you did. But people will never forget how you made them feel. “—Maya Angelou

 

The Most Dangerous Risk of All

Entrepreneurs are often given the credit for being the risk-takers. We are the ones pictured as taking the leap of faith and throwing our careers and concerns for stability aside to begin something all our own. While there is a great reward in store for those who make it to the other side, this comes at the risk of miscalculating our steps, not making ends meet and losing it all for something that adds up to absolutely nothing. This is a large risk no doubt, but I no longer see this as the most dangerous risk we stand to take in life. The most dangerous risk of all is the risk of spending your life not doing what you want on the bet that you can buy yourself the freedom to do it later. It’s the risk most of us take every day in our life and in our careers, not by consciously making risky choices, but by subconsciously burying them deep within. It’s not the risk of losing comfort and stability that we should be most scared of, it’s the risk of never knowing anything else.

I used to be one of these dangerous risk takers. I remember thinking that if I could hang in there so many more years I would be able to ensure a stable retirement package. This would have cost me almost a decade more of my life, yet I was willing to look at it as a worthy investment of my time all for the promise of finally being able to do what I really wanted several more decades down the road. I was only 23 yet I was sitting there, in my windowless cubicle, convincing myself that doubling the years of my life with work I felt no passion toward was the smart and stable investment. In retrospect, the “quarter-life crisis” that came on not too many weeks later and seen by some as reckless and arrogant, truly saved my life.

We all have a life that can be saved. This doesn’t mean we need to be to the point of depression or dark thoughts, this simply means we all have years of our life that we are at the risk of misusing with meaningless work unless some inspiration or motivation should force us to see our future one of two ways. If you’re unhappy with where you are right now, whether this is in your personal life or your career, you can take one type of risk which is to change it. With this, you risk being pushed outside your comfort zone, thrown into entrepreneurial survival mode and challenged to explore who you really are and what you’re made of. This is not comfortable nor is it stable. Or you can take another type of risk which is to do absolutely nothing. It may not feel like you’re making an active decision to take such a risk, which is what makes it the most dangerous risk of all. It’s the risk that slowly creeps into our lives disguised as comfort and stability. Only years later can we look back and see that at the risk of keeping these two crutches, we lost years spent living something much more fulfilling.

With so much emphasis placed on retirement as the time in our lives when we can finally do what we actually want, it becomes engrained in us early on that we must work the majority of our lives to fully enjoy it only when we’re old. But what about fully enjoying life while you’re young? This doesn’t come with the recommendation of quitting your job with no plan or living life as an aimless drifter. Much to the contrast, this comes with the recommendation of having a very specific plan that aligns you with making a passionate living and creating an extraordinary life at every age. It means setting goals and taking the initiative to meet them – something that dangerous risk takers don’t do. And it means creating the type of life that you’re excited to live every day, not just when you’re 55 and ½.

While you may not think you embody a real risk taker, just remember that if you’re not willing to risk it all…you already are.

 

Moment versus Momentum: Learning to Harness Fleeting Inspiration

While pursuing a career in the uncharted territory of entrepreneurship, I frequently encounter other entrepreneurs along my journey. Some are decades ahead of where I am (and hope to be) and others are merely minutes into their decision to take the leap. Among this group of individuals, the veteran entrepreneurs always seem to have at least one quality in common regardless of industry or age—they have momentum. For the greener entrepreneurs, I struggle to access whether they possess this same momentum or whether their inspiration is merely a fleeting moment. The difference in the meaning of these two words – and the affect they have on the success or failure of a dream – is far more profound than two little letters. Rather this “um” holds the inspiration, the drive and the courage to turn a single moment into a momentous career.

Is your dream a mere moment or does it carry momentum?

Among your friends and acquaintances, think about those who you would consider a dreamer or an entrepreneurial spirit. Chances are you have a variety. These people are likely different, each with their own qualities that earn them a spot in this category. Now think about those in this group who have taken a goal or idea and are in the active process of taking it to the next level. Chances are this no longer applies to everyone you originally thought of. Maybe those that don’t fit this description more accurately fit the description of coming up with brilliant and creative ideas one day, but then you never hear or see anything more about it. This is the truest differentiation I can illustrate for you between moment and momentum. I, too, have contacts that I would consider entrepreneurs at heart, but this doesn’t mean every one of them has become a real life entrepreneur. Instead, there are those who think of innovative ideas all the time, but I’ve learned to not get too excited for they’re just having “a moment.” By the next month or even the next day, the big plan for a life change has already been forgotten as quickly as it was conceived.

How do we harness this moment of inspiration and turn it into momentum?

At the root of this problem are the differing qualities of each individual. Not everyone is meant to be an entrepreneur, just like not everyone is meant to be a doctor or a rocket scientist. We all have different strengths and for some, this is taking an idea from conception to completion. For others – this is a weakness. But just like how you were told when you were little that, “you can be anything you want when you grow up,” you CAN become an entrepreneur and find your inner momentum regardless of prior failed attempts. You have at least two options to better harness your moments of inspiration and turn them into something more substantial.

First, you can commit to making a personal effort to stop the bad habits that have led to loss of momentum in the past. This includes procrastination, lack of confidence, fear of hard work or fear of failure. Just as you would commit to quit smoking or lose weight, changing any existing habit takes energy and effort. Pick a single, well-defined goal and create a timeline of specific actions. When I knew I wanted to begin my own business, I defined all the steps I had to take to reach the point of leaving my former job. I knew I needed a functional web site, enough clients to pay the bills and to register myself as an official business with the government. And so I added these to my timeline and was specific in the actions I had to take to achieve them. Every day I would assign myself one immediate thing I could do to further this timeline, whether it was sending an email to a prospective client or creating a blog. These immediate action items prevented me from falling victim to procrastination or overwhelm because they kept me on track and made me feel accomplished each and every day. Over the course of a week and then a month, these actions ultimately came together to achieve my bigger goal. I still use this tactic when I’m in a phase of business growth.

If you’ve tried or are trying to change your habits to become a person of momentum, but it just isn’t picking up as quickly as you’d like – it might be time to consider the second option. You can team up with another person or group of people who will provide complimentary skills to help turn an idea into reality. Not every business is a sole proprietorship and that’s because sometimes working together is the only way to achieve a goal of a certain scope or size.  If you have an idea for a product, but have no knowledge or direction on where to start with manufacturing it; find a partner who can provide expertise and connections in this area. A partner or team will also keep you accountable to your ideas and actions. It’s not so easy to let a dream fade if the dream is shared by many different people.

In talking with even the most successful entrepreneur, I would be shocked to hear that they never once had a failed idea or fleeting inspiration prior to their current business. To find our true calling, we must allow our mind to wander as creatively as it chooses without feeling pressured to turn every idea into reality. But when you do dream up an idea that you can envision changing your world, or the world of many others, you must find a way to harness this inspiration and keep it moving. Sometimes all it takes to turn a moment into momentum is the willingness to change yourself or team up with others…and of course a little “um!”

 

The 80/20 Principle: How to identify the clutter in your life and business

After hearing frequent references to the book “The 4-Hour Workweek,” I finally decided to put my assumptions aside and pick up a copy. To say I was skeptical is an understatement. The title of the book sounded just as cheesy and unstable as a pyramid scheme and I feared for what our “get rich quick” culture was buying into now. I wanted to be wrong about the book – and so far I can say that I was. While my reading has only progressed to page 139, I have already stumbled upon a few intriguing thoughts of author Timothy Ferriss. The most shocking realization is that he and I share a similar personality type and view on effectiveness in both work and play. I could spend weeks’ worth of blog posts regurgitating what I’ve read so far because it’s what I would tell (and have told) those who contact me for entrepreneurial advice. But instead, I want to share just one principle from the book which I’ve found to be the most thought provoking for my own business and life – The 80/20 Principle.

The 80/20 Principle or The Pareto Principle is by no means new. In fact, it was concocted by Vilfredo Pareto, an Italian economist who lived from 1848 to 1923. The boiled down back story is that through mathematical formula Pareto discovered that 80% of the wealth and income was produced and possessed by 20% of the population. And this application goes far beyond economics or distribution of wealth. Supposedly 80% of Pareto’s garden peas were produced by 20% of the pea pods he had planted. Since we don’t all grow peas, here are a few more relatable examples from the book:

• 80% of the consequences flow from 20% of the causes.
• 80% of the results come from 20% of the effort and time.
• 80% of company profits come from 20% of the products and customers.
• 80% of all stock market gains are realized by 20% of the investors and 20% of an individual portfolio.

At first glance I found this theory to be merely intriguing, but at further thought I realized it to be scarily accurate about my own life. The numbers 80 and 20 are the minimum ratio, but you too might find that some aspects of your life are more like 90/10, 95/5 or even 99/1. This concept made me take a critical look at my business and personal life. As I applied Pareto’s Principle, I had to answer some tough questions about clutter, time wasters and frustrations that were holding me back.

Applying 80/20 to Work – Nearly all businesses have more than one revenue stream. This could be a collection of different clients, projects, services and products. As a nurturing business owner, we naturally want to see all of these streams grow with equal strength. The tough realization is that this just isn’t always possible. So I had to ask myself, “Which 20% of my work and clients are resulting in 80% of my profits?” After crunching the numbers, I found that my ratio was even more skewed than 80/20. I don’t think this is necessarily good or bad, it’s just a realization of which you must be aware. Identifying the clients that account for the majority of my income helped me to also identify the qualities they have in common. I now have a clear understanding of my “ideal” client that I can market my services toward most heavily in the future. These are the ones I’m best suited to serve and the ones that will contribute most significantly to my bottom line. So long as my bandwidth allows, I will still continue to work with all clients (regardless of whether they fall into the “ideal” category or not); however, it’s infinitely helpful to know who I should be actively seeking when I’m in a cycle of business growth.

Applying 80/20 to Life – The Pareto Principle easily lends itself for application to economics or business, but what about personal life? To do this, I had to change the question I was asking myself. Instead of using money or clients as the measurements, I used happiness and stress. Which 20% of sources are causing 80% of my stress? And which 20% of sources are resulting in 80% of my happiness? I examined all the ways in which I use my free time. This includes hobbies, friendships, exercise/health, relaxation, etc. This principle helped me to personally identify the things that give me the most joy and the things that I could stand to eliminate. In doing so, I immediately reduced some of the stressors and time wasters in my every day. I even found areas within my budget where I could save money as the result of these eliminations.

We have just enough time each day to get done everything we need and want to do. We just have to learn how to identify which few inputs produce the greatest results for our time and energy. The 80/20 Principle doesn’t deter me from adding new things to my life, but it does make me regularly evaluate everything I have going on, prioritize the things that bring me happiness or fulfillment and eliminate the rest. Evaluate, prioritize and eliminate – this is the cycle that will help me to work smarter, not harder and to keep all aspects of my life uncluttered.

I look forward to continuing “The 4-Hour Workweek” with less skepticism than when I started. Even if my end goal isn’t working just four hours (and I’m not sure it is), I’m energized to read the ramblings of someone with whom I can relate. It’s encouraging to know there’s someone else out there who has ventured down a similar road and has lived to write intelligently about it…

 

The Repercussions of a Word Smith

I didn’t always have the gift of the golden pen. At least I never considered myself as anything but an average writer throughout my earlier years. I would do the assignments asked of me in school, but rarely did I earn high marks or a place on the honor board for my work. Outside of the classroom, I wrote silly poems and experimented with “novel” writing, but I’m sure if I could find these journals now I wouldn’t be inclined to ship them off to a publisher. However, at some point during the awkward years between Junior High and Senior High school, a much deeper physical transition took place. Somewhere in my brain, the part for creativity and the part for words finally synched.

We all look forward to the point in our life when we tap into a natural talent. Raw and uncharted, we anxiously explore its depths and push its boundaries. For some this is football, piano, dancing or math. For me this was writing. Though I had always earned good grades, this was the first time that writing courses were almost effortless. It seemed unfair that though I scored about the same in my math and science classes, I had to put in so much more effort and time to do so. The thrill I got out of writing is the reason I continued to make it an integral part my college major and the career I now enjoy. As my passion for both written and oral communication became clear, all other subjects blurred into the background.

As I’ve grown to accept this as my given talent, I’ve also realized some curiously common situations that seem to unfold for most gifted writers I know. I see these as the “repercussions” of a word smith. Really it’s a small price to pay for a talent that is useful in almost every line of work. But whether you’re a fellow writer or someone who has benefited from knowing one, I’m willing to bet these sound very familiar:

Group projects somehow bear only your writing – Group projects are already miserable for so many reasons, but when you’re identified as a “good writer” they become even worse. No matter how hard I tried to prevent this from happening, the end result was inevitable. I would either have to start the project from scratch or rework the less than stellar writing of my group partners. By the end of it, the writing always seemed to be my own. Sometimes this was me being taken advantage of, sometimes this was for the good of the group (and our group grade), but sometimes this was just me being a writing control freak. I can admit it…finally.

You’re the go-to “first drafter” – With my school days now behind me, the repercussions of a wordsmith have still kept in tow. Rather than the finisher for group projects, I have now become the go-to person for taking the first stab at letters, short bios, resumes and blog posts for family and friends. I’m always happy to offer my two cents, but creating something from scratch requires a bit more energy and effort than just two pennies worth of my time. As you might expect a dentist to get tired of hearing about tooth ailments on the weekend, writers also like to be just people from time to time.

Heck, you’re the go-to “final drafter” too – Though revising a final draft takes a different set of skills than the initial writing of one, it still requires a good deal of energy and effort if you want to do it right. Sure I can quickly review a document to make sure the I’s are dotted and the T’s crossed, but it’s hard to tone down a skill set that, when used for my livelihood, is kept at high octane. If I see a poorly written letter, I can’t not fix it. I’ll sit there and pour hours of my life into a document I shouldn’t have more concern over than that piece of chewing gum I just threw away. But when you’re passionate about something, you do. When you ask your writer friend for a “quick once over,” just remember that he’ll give you the same quality of service that he would give a client or put into his own work. A thoughtful thank you from time goes a long way.

Greeting cards and party invitations get sent your way – Much like the first and final drafter, a wordsmith is also often called in for input on Christmas card phrases, meaningful words for a thank you note and creative rhymes to put on a birthday invite. This is the fun stuff! And personally the stuff I love creating the most. But it can become a burden when you receive these casual requests on top of a pile of mounting client work. Also I tend to put pressure on myself to come up with the most perfectly witty or thoughtful lines – a pressure that is not intended or required, but a habit I’ve developed all on my own.

It becomes seen as an endless fountain of creativity – As I mentioned above, it’s an exciting experience to explore the depths of a new found talent, but I don’t assume it is indeed endless. My hands and mind do get exhausted to a point where eventually I slump into a couch pillow and stare at the wall for a little while during a busy writing day. It’s a compliment to have so many family members and friends turn to me for my opinion and input, but I do feel the need to conserve my creativity or at least let it refill from time to time. After all, what would I do for a living if it somehow ran out?!

I hope these “repercussions” of a word smith have resonated with you in some way or if not, at least made you smile. Though my talent is with words, I know these situations are not unique to writers. I imagine doctors, artists, athletes and politicians all have similar gripes about how their talents have made them feel like a mere resource to the world around them. The best we can each do is to celebrate each other’s talents by not only utilizing them, but also by giving them a day off from time to time.

What are some of the repercussions your own talent has brought you?

 

Never Lose Sight of Your Childhood Dream

Every time a beautiful home catches my eye or I’m inspired by a furniture store’s interior design, I’m reminded that there was a time in my life when I was quite certain that I would grow up to become a creator similar works of art. Yes, my childhood dream was to become an architect and interior designer. The signs were quite obvious, really. The remnants of my mounding collection of doll houses can still be found packed away in my parent’s attic. Yet instead of playing house with the tiny people inside these homes, I would spend hours rearranging furniture and building additional walls to expand the modest structures into dream mansions.  I filled binders and binders with magazine pictures of bedrooms, kitchens and patios and would stare at blueprints long enough until I could visualize the house I would use them to someday create. And at the age when most children were still building with Legos and Lincoln Logs, I taught myself to use the same computer programs used by professional architects and designers.

Even as an adult, the memory of this childhood passion is still vivid.  It’s no longer as common that I allow myself to become so consumed in a hobby or so certain of a dream – and maybe that’s why I love to reminisce back to the time in my life when I did. Childhood should be a time for complete creative freedom and to allow natural talents to shine through. It is also a time that can tell us a lot of about ourselves and who we were destined to become long before we let responsibilities, worries and failures affect our dreams.

It should be obvious to you now that I never became that architect or interior designer of my dreams. The level of intensity I had for this hobby didn’t outlast high school. Instead, I slowly migrated into a completely different career path in communications and writing. Not many people know about my dreams to become an architect that I once constructed so carefully. For the longest time I thought it to be irrelevant and to some degree an admittance of failure. I walked away from something I was so passionate about and never felt the need to look back. Or did I?

To this day, I may not have a portfolio of beautifully furnished houses to showcase, but I do have quite a different portfolio of equally impressive work. I’ve never built a home, but I’ve built a brand and business. I don’t use my creative talent toward interior design, but I do use my creativity in so many broader ways every day. That passion for building something from the ground up and talent for thinking outside the box were never lost, only reassigned. I’m a Public Relations professional, not an architect, but I’m confident this is what all my childhood daydreaming has prepared me to do.

So many years ago I may have mastered some impressive feats for a 10-year-old architect, but I wouldn’t have had the slightest clue as to what Public Relations was and certainly wouldn’t have understood how to apply my talents toward this career path. Yet, with every choice I made to move away from architecture and design, I took one step in the right direction of finding the career I now have today. I couldn’t be more grateful for all the hours I spent playing with those doll houses. Almost 15 years later, I still have yet to build a single home, but I’ve built exactly what my childhood self would have wished for had she known everything that was possible.

As a child, did you ever have a passionate dream about becoming something far different than what you are today? Look closely at the career path you have chosen and you may see that these childhood talents were never lost, only reassigned.  Share your own story by commenting below!