The Repercussions of a Word Smith

I didn’t always have the gift of the golden pen. At least I never considered myself as anything but an average writer throughout my earlier years. I would do the assignments asked of me in school, but rarely did I earn high marks or a place on the honor board for my work. Outside of the classroom, I wrote silly poems and experimented with “novel” writing, but I’m sure if I could find these journals now I wouldn’t be inclined to ship them off to a publisher. However, at some point during the awkward years between Junior High and Senior High school, a much deeper physical transition took place. Somewhere in my brain, the part for creativity and the part for words finally synched.

We all look forward to the point in our life when we tap into a natural talent. Raw and uncharted, we anxiously explore its depths and push its boundaries. For some this is football, piano, dancing or math. For me this was writing. Though I had always earned good grades, this was the first time that writing courses were almost effortless. It seemed unfair that though I scored about the same in my math and science classes, I had to put in so much more effort and time to do so. The thrill I got out of writing is the reason I continued to make it an integral part my college major and the career I now enjoy. As my passion for both written and oral communication became clear, all other subjects blurred into the background.

As I’ve grown to accept this as my given talent, I’ve also realized some curiously common situations that seem to unfold for most gifted writers I know. I see these as the “repercussions” of a word smith. Really it’s a small price to pay for a talent that is useful in almost every line of work. But whether you’re a fellow writer or someone who has benefited from knowing one, I’m willing to bet these sound very familiar:

Group projects somehow bear only your writing – Group projects are already miserable for so many reasons, but when you’re identified as a “good writer” they become even worse. No matter how hard I tried to prevent this from happening, the end result was inevitable. I would either have to start the project from scratch or rework the less than stellar writing of my group partners. By the end of it, the writing always seemed to be my own. Sometimes this was me being taken advantage of, sometimes this was for the good of the group (and our group grade), but sometimes this was just me being a writing control freak. I can admit it…finally.

You’re the go-to “first drafter” – With my school days now behind me, the repercussions of a wordsmith have still kept in tow. Rather than the finisher for group projects, I have now become the go-to person for taking the first stab at letters, short bios, resumes and blog posts for family and friends. I’m always happy to offer my two cents, but creating something from scratch requires a bit more energy and effort than just two pennies worth of my time. As you might expect a dentist to get tired of hearing about tooth ailments on the weekend, writers also like to be just people from time to time.

Heck, you’re the go-to “final drafter” too – Though revising a final draft takes a different set of skills than the initial writing of one, it still requires a good deal of energy and effort if you want to do it right. Sure I can quickly review a document to make sure the I’s are dotted and the T’s crossed, but it’s hard to tone down a skill set that, when used for my livelihood, is kept at high octane. If I see a poorly written letter, I can’t not fix it. I’ll sit there and pour hours of my life into a document I shouldn’t have more concern over than that piece of chewing gum I just threw away. But when you’re passionate about something, you do. When you ask your writer friend for a “quick once over,” just remember that he’ll give you the same quality of service that he would give a client or put into his own work. A thoughtful thank you from time goes a long way.

Greeting cards and party invitations get sent your way – Much like the first and final drafter, a wordsmith is also often called in for input on Christmas card phrases, meaningful words for a thank you note and creative rhymes to put on a birthday invite. This is the fun stuff! And personally the stuff I love creating the most. But it can become a burden when you receive these casual requests on top of a pile of mounting client work. Also I tend to put pressure on myself to come up with the most perfectly witty or thoughtful lines – a pressure that is not intended or required, but a habit I’ve developed all on my own.

It becomes seen as an endless fountain of creativity – As I mentioned above, it’s an exciting experience to explore the depths of a new found talent, but I don’t assume it is indeed endless. My hands and mind do get exhausted to a point where eventually I slump into a couch pillow and stare at the wall for a little while during a busy writing day. It’s a compliment to have so many family members and friends turn to me for my opinion and input, but I do feel the need to conserve my creativity or at least let it refill from time to time. After all, what would I do for a living if it somehow ran out?!

I hope these “repercussions” of a word smith have resonated with you in some way or if not, at least made you smile. Though my talent is with words, I know these situations are not unique to writers. I imagine doctors, artists, athletes and politicians all have similar gripes about how their talents have made them feel like a mere resource to the world around them. The best we can each do is to celebrate each other’s talents by not only utilizing them, but also by giving them a day off from time to time.

What are some of the repercussions your own talent has brought you?

 

Most Common Grammar Mistakes: Are you sure I learned this before?

No matter how many hours a day I spend writing and editing my work or the work of my clients’, I’m not immune to the common (and very embarrassing) grammar mistakes that I know I’ve learned countless times. I admit that I still turn to Google for a quick grammar recap on effect vs affect or which vs that – and I’ll also admit that sometimes after doing so I still don’t know the right answer! There are moments when I just feel like Ralph Wiggum….

I recently stumbled upon a fantastic list of the 20 most common grammar mistakes and was amazed that these were even rules of the English language, considering I see them misused all of the time (including in my own work). This is valuable information worth reading and learning since nothing can put a dent in your professional reputation quicker than a glaring grammatical error. Please visit Lit Reactor for the full article in which this list was originally published.

Who and Whom

This one opens a big can of worms. “Who” is a subjective — or nominative — pronoun, along with “he,” “she,” “it,” “we,” and “they.” It’s used when the pronoun acts as the subject of a clause. “Whom” is an objective pronoun, along with “him,” “her,” “it”, “us,” and “them.” It’s used when the pronoun acts as the object of a clause. Using “who” or “whom” depends on whether you’re referring to the subject or object of a sentence. When in doubt, substitute “who” with the subjective pronouns “he” or “she,” e.g., Who loves you? cf., He loves me. Similarly, you can also substitute “whom” with the objective pronouns “him” or “her.” e.g., I consulted an attorney whom I met in New York. cf., I consulted him.

 Which and That

This is one of the most common mistakes out there, and understandably so. “That” is a restrictive pronoun. It’s vital to the noun to which it’s referring. e.g., I don’t trust fruits and vegetables that aren’t organic. Here, I’m referring to all non-organic fruits or vegetables. In other words, I only trust fruits and vegetables that are organic. “Which” introduces a relative clause. It allows qualifiers that may not be essential. e.g., I recommend you eat only organic fruits and vegetables, which are available in area grocery stores. In this case, you don’t have to go to a specific grocery store to obtain organic fruits and vegetables. “Which” qualifies, “that” restricts. “Which” is more ambiguous however, and by virtue of its meaning is flexible enough to be used in many restrictive clauses. e.g., The house, which is burning, is mine. e.g., The house that is burning is mine.

 Lay and Lie

This is the crown jewel of all grammatical errors. “Lay” is a transitive verb. It requires a direct subject and one or more objects. Its present tense is “lay” (e.g., I lay the pencil on the table) and its past tense is “laid” (e.g., Yesterday I laid the pencil on the table). “Lie” is an intransitive verb. It needs no object. Its present tense is “lie” (e.g., The Andes mountains lie between Chile and Argentina) and its past tense is “lay” (e.g., The man lay waiting for an ambulance). The most common mistake occurs when the writer uses the past tense of the transitive “lay” (e.g., I laid on the bed) when he/she actually means the intransitive past tense of “lie” (e.g., I lay on the bed).

 Moot

Contrary to common misuse, “moot” doesn’t imply something is superfluous. It means a subject is disputable or open to discussion. e.g., The idea that commercial zoning should be allowed in the residential neighborhood was a moot point for the council.

 Continual and Continuous

They’re similar, but there’s a difference. “Continual” means something that’s always occurring, with obvious lapses in time. “Continuous” means something continues without any stops or gaps in between. e.g., The continual music next door made it the worst night of studying ever. e.g., Her continuous talking prevented him from concentrating.

 Envy and Jealousy

The word “envy” implies a longing for someone else’s good fortunes. “Jealousy” is far more nefarious. It’s a fear of rivalry, often present in sexual situations. “Envy” is when you covet your friend’s good looks. “Jealousy” is what happens when your significant other swoons over your good-looking friend.

 Nor

“Nor” expresses a negative condition. It literally means “and not.” You’re obligated to use the “nor” form if your sentence expresses a negative and follows it with another negative condition. “Neither the men nor the women were drunk” is a correct sentence because “nor” expresses that the women held the same negative condition as the men. The old rule is that “nor” typically follows “neither,” and “or” follows “either.” However, if neither “either” nor “neither” is used in a sentence, you should use “nor” to express a second negative, as long as the second negative is a verb. If the second negative is a noun, adjective, or adverb, you would use “or,” because the initial negative transfers to all conditions. e.g., He won’t eat broccoli or asparagus. The negative condition expressing the first noun (broccoli) is also used for the second (asparagus).

 May and Might

“May” implies a possibility. “Might” implies far more uncertainty. “You may get drunk if you have two shots in ten minutes” implies a real possibility of drunkenness. “You might get a ticket if you operate a tug boat while drunk” implies a possibility that is far more remote. Someone who says “I may have more wine” could mean he/she doesn’t want more wine right now, or that he/she “might” not want any at all. Given the speaker’s indecision on the matter, “might” would be correct.

 Whether and If

Many writers seem to assume that “whether” is interchangeable with “if.” It isn’t. “Whether” expresses a condition where there are two or more alternatives. “If” expresses a condition where there are no alternatives. e.g., I don’t know whether I’ll get drunk tonight. e.g., I can get drunk tonight if I have money for booze.

 Fewer and Less

“Less” is reserved for hypothetical quantities. “Few” and “fewer” are for things you can quantify. e.g., The firm has fewer than ten employees. e.g., The firm is less successful now that we have only ten employees.

 Farther and Further

The word “farther” implies a measurable distance. “Further” should be reserved for abstract lengths you can’t always measure. e.g., I threw the ball ten feet farther than Bill. e.g., The financial crisis caused further implications.

 Since and Because

“Since” refers to time. “Because” refers to causation. e.g., Since I quit drinking I’ve married and had two children. e.g., Because I quit drinking I no longer wake up in my own vomit.

 Disinterested and Uninterested

Contrary to popular usage, these words aren’t synonymous. A “disinterested” person is someone who’s impartial. For example, a hedge fund manager might take interest in a headline regarding the performance of a popular stock, even if he’s never invested in it. He’s “disinterested,” i.e., he doesn’t seek to gain financially from the transaction he’s witnessed. Judges and referees are supposed to be “disinterested.” If the sentence you’re using implies someone who couldn’t care less, chances are you’ll want to use “uninterested.”

 Anxious

Unless you’re frightened of them, you shouldn’t say you’re “anxious to see your friends.” You’re actually “eager,” or “excited.” To be “anxious” implies a looming fear, dread or anxiety. It doesn’t mean you’re looking forward to something.

 Different Than and Different From

This is a tough one. Words like “rather” and “faster” are comparative adjectives, and are used to show comparison with the preposition “than,” (e.g., greater than, less than, faster than, rather than). The adjective “different” is used to draw distinction. So, when “different” is followed by a preposition, it should be “from,” similar to “separate from,” “distinct from,” or “away from.” e.g., My living situation in New York was different from home. There are rare cases where “different than” is appropriate, if “than” operates as a conjunction. e.g., Development is different in New York than in Los Angeles. When in doubt, use “different from.”

 Bring and Take

In order to employ proper usage of “bring” or “take,” the writer must know whether the object is being moved toward or away from the subject. If it is toward, use “bring.” If it is away, use “take.” Your spouse may tell you to “take your clothes to the cleaners.” The owner of the dry cleaners would say “bring your clothes to the cleaners.”

 Impactful

It isn’t a word. “Impact” can be used as a noun (e.g., The impact of the crash was severe) or a transitive verb (e.g., The crash impacted my ability to walk or hold a job). “Impactful” is a made-up buzzword, colligated by the modern marketing industry in their endless attempts to decode the innumerable nuances of human behavior into a string of mindless metrics. Seriously, stop saying this.

 Affect and Effect

Here’s a trick to help you remember: “Affect” is almost always a verb (e.g., Facebook affects people’s attention spans), and “effect” is almost always a noun (e.g., Facebook’s effects can also be positive). “Affect” means to influence or produce an impression — to cause hence, an effect. “Effect” is the thing produced by the affecting agent; it describes the result or outcome. There are some exceptions. “Effect” may be used as a transitive verb, which means to bring about or make happen. e.g., My new computer effected a much-needed transition from magazines to Web porn. There are similarly rare examples where “affect” can be a noun. e.g., His lack of affect made him seem like a shallow person.

 Irony and Coincidence

Too many people claim something is the former when they actually mean the latter. For example, it’s not “ironic” that “Barbara moved from California to New York, where she ended up meeting and falling in love with a fellow Californian.” The fact that they’re both from California is a “coincidence.” “Irony” is the incongruity in a series of events between the expected results and the actual results. “Coincidence” is a series of events that appear planned when they’re actually accidental. So, it would be “ironic” if “Barbara moved from California to New York to escape California men, but the first man she ended up meeting and falling in love with was a fellow Californian.”

 Nauseous

Undoubtedly the most common mistake I encounter. Contrary to almost ubiquitous misuse, to be “nauseous” doesn’t mean you’ve been sickened: it actually means you possess the ability to produce nausea in others. e.g., That week-old hot dog is nauseous. When you find yourself disgusted or made ill by a nauseating agent, you are actually “nauseated.” e.g., I was nauseated after falling into that dumpster behind the Planned Parenthood. Stop embarrassing yourself.

Which of these mistakes did you find most surprising? Are they rules you already know or ones you’ve never seen explained? Share your thoughts!

 

Examining the Foundation of Effective Teamwork (Guest Blog by Todd Shirley)

This week’s post comes from returning guest blogger, Todd Shirley. Todd is a talented writer with a wealth of knowledge to share. I hope you are inspired to leave a comment or engage in conversation after reading this post. To learn more about Todd, please visit his biography at the end.

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Examining The Foundation of Effective Teamwork

I am convicted about my work. I show initiative. I am highly motivated to promote positive change for my student’s learning and home environments. I hope to empower educators and parents through consultation to effectively work with adolescents. I consider myself well read on counseling related materials and special populations. I often boast or complain about my 65 hour work week entrenched in counseling related work.

This does not mean I am a good team player.

Teamwork is hard for me.  It’s also a fact of life. Professionally, I stand with a foot in both education and human service;  EVERYTHING I do is through the vehicle of an education team or service team.

Ayn Rand was not cut out for either field.

Recently another hectic school year came to an end. I used my time off to reflect and ready myself to face another summer filled with teams.  What resulted is a new understanding of teamwork that I describe as the following:

1. Delegation Is An Opportunity To Encourage

Team projects can be difficult experiences for me as I tend to embody a “if it’s going to be done right, I have to do it” mindset.  Now I see teams and group projects as an opportunity to demonstrate trust and encouragement through delegation.  Delegating allows others to reach a goal.  Helping others reach goals was exhilarating this year.

2. It’s Valuable To Pay Attention To Resentment

I recently found myself talking to people about how I resented one of my school teams. This team deals with student concerns but looks to me with facial expressions that seem to say “isn’t it your job to care about these things?”  It goes without saying, I feel it’s the team’s job to care about student concerns.

Three helpful insights came from paying attention to my resentment:

1. My inability to let things go.

2. My inability to say “no” to things.

3. My inability to accept people for where they are and not be angry with them for where they should be.

The last insight was powerful because I try to nudge everyone I work with to reach a point of acceptance about others and life circumstances.

3. Teamwork Can Be The Kitchen That Makes Good Humble Pie

This school year’s end of year faculty meeting provided the inspiration for this post. Faculty meetings in my building often involve a lot of tangents and side chit-chat. This year, everyone fell notably silent as a co-worker (and team member of mine) shared information I had put together.

“10% of our students were referred to our student assistance team this year. Of those 10%, 25 students had to miss school due to illness or death of a parent.  14 were referred for non-suicidal self injurious behaviors etc…”

I was taken aback as I realized the information had to come from her for it to matter. If I had presented (which I enjoy doing), I would have been dismissed. As disheartening information related to our individual students came from a fellow teacher, people received it readily. Apparently, things can get done without me. Fork please!

Looking Ahead

I believe passion in my field can either prevent or cause burnout.  I hope to do this kind of work forever but if I am an ineffective team member, I don’t know if I can.

If I can approach teamwork as an opportunity to encourage others, establish trust, and embrace humility,  it’s only going to help students, families, and educators embody this approach too.

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Todd Shirley works full time as a school counselor and carries a caseload of clients who are in the foster care system. When he is not working, he is reading, working out, cooking Paleo and discussing all that is arbitrary about life. Oh-and his favorite animal is the manatee. Todd is an incredible guest blogger with a wealth of knowledge to share. I hope you are inspired to leave a comment or engage in conversation having now read this post. You are always welcome to share your thoughts below!

 

Quarter Life Crisis As An Indicator of Differentiation (Guest Blog by Todd Shirley)

The following blog post is part of the Bennis Blogger Battle. Support Todd by “Liking” this post, leaving a comment and sharing it on your social media! The blog with the most hits, wins. (I should also mention that Wednesday March 7th is his birthday–so be sure to give him some extra love!)

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While presenting a workshop and working late, a close friend from childhood sent me an email that hinted at the hidden influence his loved ones continue to have over his career decisions.  While reading it,  I felt confused at how such an independent soul could be stuck in an unsatisfying career.

As a self proclaimed “counselor nerd”, who loves both of his jobs, I felt the best way to understand his predicament was to think of it in terms of a continuum (counselor nerds love continuums). At one end of this continuum sits enmeshment- the process of moving close to an individual or group. At the other end sits differentiation- the process of recognizing you are separate from others and their expectations. People cycle through periods of enmeshment and differentiation throughout their lives.  It’s also possible to experience them simultaneously in a paradox that is always difficult. Career development is the stage for which this paradox plays out in two dramatic ways.

This paradox manifests in an ugly manner when people take a prescribed path while recognizing they resent doing so. Ever hear of a mid-life crisis? People who don’t untangle this manifestation of the paradox at their quarter life crisis end up with a mid life crisis.

The other manifestation of this paradox is much prettier.  I’ve seen it play out with loved ones when they moved across the country to take a new job despite a dramatic drop in salary and prestige. Their career shifts were expressions of being differentiated from outside influences. This prevents the mid life crisis.

My friend’s email outlined themes regarding going through the motions of work and his reservations about pursuing a line of work he wants. With the continuum above, his job struggle is clearly linked to a familiar identity struggle. There are some points I’ll quote in an effort to illustrate his concerns in the context of our friendship:

1. Money will always be of concern to me. The last thing I want is to burden my friends and family because I am broke and can’t make it.
Reading it took me back to a difficult two year chapter in my own life.  My wife and I were differentiating from each other. I was intensely afraid that our inevitable split would burden my family.  Through hours of conversation- where he was sincere and genuine- he helped show me I’d be OK and my family would too. If he’s broke, I could care less.  He and I have had great times in our adult lives without money.

2. What monumental thing have I accomplished while unemployed?

The time unemployed he references in this rhetorical question was a period of 5 weeks. He was looking for work because he had to move due to his wife’s career. His self consciousness overshadows his hard work.  He ran his first marathon in under three hours and thirty minutes. Built an amazing desk. AND found a job with improved pay and working conditions over his last one. If those three things aren’t monumental, I’m not sure what is…. I don’t think I’ve done anything like that in the last year while employed.

In times past, he’s proven himself to put time in at a job he hates to pursue new heights. This time for him is no different from any other identity struggle he’s pulled through in the past.  His loved ones are waiting for him to make his move…

Todd Shirley works a full time as a school counselor and carries a caseload of clients who are in the foster care system. When he is not working, he is reading, working out, cooking paleo and discussing all that is arbitrary about life. Oh-and his favorite animal is the manatee. Please support Todd by “Liking” this post or by leaving a comment below!

Oh–and HAPPY BIRTHDAY Todd!

 

Combining a Degree With Experience: Four Things College Students Need To Do Before They Graduate

Bennis Inc is pleased to welcome another guest blogger this week! As college students around the world make their final push toward the end of the fall semester, final exams, holidays and a month-long break from school may be at the forefront of their minds. But as you enjoy the upcoming winter break, consider this insightful blog post by Cheval John. Cheval discusses four ways college students can make their degree worth even more in the real-world through things they can do as undergrads (To learn more about Cheval John, please see the paragraph following his post).

Many people can relate to this scenario: a recent college graduate is looking for an entry-level job only to find out that the employer is looking for someone with experience along with that college degree. But how can you get experience if you can’t get a job? Here are four remarkably accessible ways a college student can earn career experience before they step out into the real-world:

1. Join a Student Organization.

Joining a student organization allows you to expand your network, gain professional experience and serve in leadership roles all before stepping your foot in the real-world. This doesn’t mean go out and join every club your university has to offer. The main benefits of joining an organization come from being an active member. Choose the clubs that you are personally passionate about and are professionally applicable to your career aspirations. For example, if you hope to work in the human resource field, consider joining a student chapter of the Society for Human Resource Management. This club will connect you directly with professionals who work in your field and allow you to serve in a leadership role that highlights the skills a future employer will look for. For a real-life example, just ask Megan Murphy.

2. Write For Your College Newspaper.

Why write for a college newspaper you ask? Because it teaches you time management! Having to meet both class and newspaper deadlines will force you to prioritize your time and stay on task. Possibly the most important benefit of writing for your college newspaper is that it allows you to learn the “ins and outs” of your university and to meet influential people that run your university. So maybe you’re not a journalism major and writing isn’t your calling. These are even better reasons to take part! In addition to improving your written communication, an extremely powerful skill set to have, it will also show future employers that you take initiative and can excel at any task you are given. Don’t take my word for it, ask Stephen Green!

3. Start a Blog.

If you’re already writing regularly for your college newspaper, consider starting a blog. It’s easy to feel like you don’t have the time because of your class schedule, but blogging can require as little as 30 minutes each week (which can easily be carved out of Facebook surfing time). Through blogging, you are demonstrating that you know how to create and maintain your own website and interact with people from all over the world. Depending on the topics of your blogging, you can even gain an edge when looking for a job. Say you are applying for a marketing position and you have a blog about market trends, this adds credibility and experience to your knowledge that will set you apart. Note: When blogging, it’s important that you blog consistently and interact with the blogging community, because this is how you grow your blog and show your dedication to completing a task.

4. Study Abroad.

Globalization is happening around us and employers realize that competition is both domestic and international. Businesses need people who not only have technical knowledge, but cultural knowledge as well. Studying abroad allows you to see the world from a different point of view and take a course that may not be offered at your home university. Two years ago, I studied abroad at the University of Vina del Mar in Vina del Mar, Chile. It allowed me to understand why Chile was different from the other Latin American countries and to improve my Spanish through staying with a host family. Also consider taking an internship while abroad to step outside of your comfort zone and increase your cultural knowledge by working with the locals. Earning part of your degree while studying abroad shows employers that you can learn, work and succeed in a culture that is different from your own!

Recommended Websites: www.transitionsabroad.com and www.trafficgenerationcafe.com

About the Guest Blogger: Cheval John is a sports reporter and staff blogger for the Houstonian, the independent student newspaper of Sam Houston State University. Cheval is currently working toward a Master of Arts Degree in Spanish. He studied abroad in Mexico during the summer of 2008 and studied and interned abroad in Chile during the summer of 2009. Please check out Cheval’s blog here!

 

What I wish My College Professors Would Have Taught Me: Tardiness is Unacceptable

There are some things that can and will never be taught in the classroom. Maybe it’s because those topics are seen as too radical or have been flagged as a lawsuit risk, but truly these are the missing pieces of wisdom that leave many college grads as an incomplete puzzle with still much to figure out in the real world. In the spirit of Back-to-School, this will be a 5-part series exploring the top lessons I wish would have been included in my own college degree. It’s blunt and it’s honest, but it’s sure to be interesting.

Lesson five: Tardiness is Unacceptable

The Persistence of Memory by Salvador Dali, 1931

I see this saying everywhere, but it has really stayed with me—

“Opportunity doesn’t go away, it goes to someone else.”

Partially due to this very saying I’ve become a huge stickler for timeliness and I first and foremost apply these standards to myself. Through experiences, both good and bad, I know that not responding to an e-mail, or message of any form, within a reasonable time frame could lose me a potential business opportunity. Applied to

another situation—showing up late to an event not only displays lack of interest, but could cost me key networking opportunities. These facts of life are ones I had to learn on my own, outside the walls of a classroom. While I was in college, it seemed as though time was irrelevant and I don’t just mean by pulling all nighters or staying out ‘til the sun came up.

Far too often I had professors who accepted late papers without even challenging the student to provide a reason. These were the same professors that would let students saunter into class fifteen, twenty, sometimes even forty minutes late carrying lattes in their hand looking anything but rushed, disheveled or apologetic.  They would walk right in front of the professor, mid-lecture, and disrupt the focus of the classroom and make us on-timers wonder why we even bothered setting our alarms if clearly there were no repercussions. So maybe this boils down to a matter of principle and respect—no matter what my underlying issue is with tardiness, I see it as worthy of deeper discussion.

I wish my college professors would have stressed the importance of timeliness, which of course goes hand-in-hand with time management. As students, we would have benefited from learning that boundaries exist and when someone who is in a position of power over us sets such a boundary, we are expected to comply. This would have taught us to be more respectful, responsible and better stewards of our time. Those college years are crucial ones. We are experimenting with both the freedoms and obligations that come with living on our own. While we may be seeking our independence, we still need reminders that we don’t make ALL of our own rules and opportunities are like college co-eds—if you don’t pay them quick enough attention, they’re on to the next person who will.

In case you missed a few “classes”, here’s some reading homework:

Lesson One: Group projects can be completed alone.

Lesson Two: It’s okay to NOT like everyone you work with.

Lesson Three: In the real world, you’re not expected to have every answer.

Lesson Four: It’s almost never about WHAT you know.

 

What I wish My College Professors Would Have Taught Me: It’s almost never about WHAT you know

There are some things that can and will never be taught in the classroom. Maybe it’s because those topics are seen as too radical or have been flagged as a lawsuit risk, but truly these are the missing pieces of wisdom that leave many college grads as an incomplete puzzle with still much to figure out in the real world. In the spirit of Back-to-School, this will be a 5-part series exploring the top lessons I wish would have been included in my own college degree. It’s blunt and it’s honest, but it’s sure to be interesting.

Lesson four: It’s almost never about WHAT you know

I wish my professors would have just been honest with us. How successful you are (basically) boils down to two things—who you know and how well you sell yourself. Especially for all the readers out there with a degree in Public Relations, Communications or the similar, you know what I’m talking about. Our communication skills, social competence and depth and breadth of our relationships are directly related to our success.

Throughout my years spent at Penn State, my classrooms were filled with hoards of Advertising and Public Relations students all training to be “master communicators.” Some students aced every test and could recite any answer a teacher asked of them, but they often blended into the background as soon as they put their hand down. The students who did make the biggest impression weren’t the ones breaking the curve, necessarily. They were the ones who could pull together an impromptu presentation with ease and confidence and could make a classroom of 500+ students laugh and feel as if they knew them personally.

This ties-in closely with Lesson three: In the real world, you’re not expected to have every answer. I’m not talking about the students too lazy to open a book or the ones aiming for a career as a professional “bull shitter.” I’m talking about the students who did more than write the concept on a note card and memorize it; instead, they absorbed the concept and immediately applied it to their communications strategy of selling themselves. I’m sure everyone has a few of these friends in their lives. They catch on quick, have an impeccable ability to read a situation and make lasting impressions that build their networks almost effortlessly.

So maybe this isn’t something that can be entirely taught in a classroom, but these are skills we all possess to some degree. I wish my professors would have worked to help us refine these skills through “social challenges” such as walking into a business and asking for an impromptu meeting with the owner/marketing director to pitch an idea or even attend a party where you enter as a complete stranger and leave with at least 3 acquaintances—these type of challenges would have tested our core social abilities and helped to build skills we would have used immediately in any career.

I knew people who, even as 20-something year old college students, were too timid or insecure to call a restaurant for their business hours or walk into a party if they didn’t know at least 5 people. Anyone, no matter their field of study, could have benefited from at least one course emphasizing social intelligence to supplement the “what you know” with the “how well you can sell it.”

Even if you’re at the top of your class, you’ll be that much more valuable to a future employer if you have the social and communication skills to convey this knowledge.

In case you missed a few “classes”, here’s some reading homework:

Lesson One: Group projects can be completed alone.

Lesson Two: It’s okay to NOT like everyone you work with.

Lesson Three: In the real world, you’re not expected to have every answer.

 

What I wish My College Professors Would Have Taught Me: In the real world, you’re not expected to have every answer.

There are some things that can and will never be taught in the classroom. Maybe it’s because those topics are seen as too radical or have been flagged as a lawsuit risk, but truly these are the missing pieces of wisdom that leave many college grads as an incomplete puzzle with still much to figure out in the real world. In the spirit of Back-to-School, this will be a 5-part series exploring the top lessons I wish would have been included in my own college degree. It’s blunt and it’s honest, but it’s sure to be interesting.

Lesson three: In the real world, you’re not expected to have every answer.

Pop quizzes and cumulative exams have taught us to panic at the thought of not knowing every answer. But this neither prepares us for reality nor sets realistic expectations. If you think you know everything, you’re going to learn nothing from life. Instead, I wish at least one of my professors would have tested us not on our ability to memorize answers but to handle questions we had no way of knowing the answer to in a professional and educated manner.

This would have been the ultimate test to our ability to survive the real world.

I have yet to make a pitch to a client where I haven’t been asked at least one question that I had to go home, gather more information and get back to them about. I feel like being able to openly admit when you don’t know the answer is both humanizing and demonstrating your thoroughness of getting an accurate answer rather than faking one just to look good. I’m not saying DON’T be knowledgeable in your field, but focus more of your efforts on being a genuine and approachable person who has a sincere desire to seek the answers they don’t know.  This will win you more business and more respect than by being a know-it-all or rather—a “fake-it-all.”

In case you missed a few “classes”, here’s some reading homework:

Lesson One: Group projects can be completed alone.

Lesson Two: It’s okay to NOT like everyone you work with.

 

What I wish My College Professors Would Have Taught Me: Group projects can be completed alone.

There are some things that can and will never be taught in the classroom. Maybe it’s because those topics are seen as too radical or have been flagged as a lawsuit risk, but truly these are the missing pieces of wisdom that leave many college grads as an incomplete puzzle with still much to figure out in the real world. In the spirit of Back-to-School, this will be a 5-part series exploring the top lessons I wish would have been included in my own college degree. It’s blunt and it’s honest, but it’s sure to be interesting.

Lesson One: Group projects can be completed alone.

There's no shame in being the 'Lone Ranger' if it's how you do your best work.

Group Projects –We all remember them and probably share similar horror stories for a variety of reasons. My own experiences are quite negative as well. I always felt forced into a group project where, for better or for worse, I would take over and do it all myself. And to be perfectly honest, I’m not blaming my group members as much as my dominating personality. I would have much appreciated a professor to extend the option of working alone. It wouldn’t have given me any extra credit or held my project to a special grading scale, but it would have given me the opportunity to find my entrepreneurial roots sooner. I would have more readily realized that what any 5-person group was doing, I had the capability of not only doing alone—but also the ability to create a better, more cohesive project overall rather than the slapped together, mismatched work of a group project handed-in in such a rush that the still-wet printer ink smears in the professors hands. I digress…

By making groups an option rather than a mandate, teachers could have taught us to find our true potential, challenge our work ethic and learn what working style best fits our individual personalities. Yes a large project may be big and scary when looked at as a whole, but a project of that scale has the potential to teach students time management and what may seem overwhelming and impossible for one person to complete really isn’t all that bad when broken down.

Don’t get me wrong, real work situations will require you to work in groups of all numbers and learning team work skills is crucial. What I’m suggesting is rather than those classes that ONLY allowed students to work as teams or in groups is to at least present the option to mix it up and try new working combinations. This would allow us to better grasp the scope of our capabilities sooner–and maybe this is so important to me because I believe they far exceed what we ever imagine possible.

 

That’ll Learn Ya

I recently came across the quote by Jim Rohn, “Formal education will make you a living; self-education will make you a fortune.“

Naturally, I quickly took a tally of the student loans I still owe and the knowledge that was packed into me from Kindergarten until college graduation. Is this what has earned me my career? I mean, sure–I wouldn’t even have a job at a fast-food chain if I didn’t know how to read or write. And my college years helped me to refine my interests and connect with people that ultimately got me to where I am today. But I can’t help but resonate with this quote and the feeling that what I learned on my own, through trial and error after error after error, is what truly allowed me to make a success of what I love doing.

Consider this: Right now, how many of the skills you use everyday for your career did you know in college? I’m willing to bet (more money than most did on the Kentucky Derby) that 97% of the skills you rely on daily to do your job you learned–on the job. A lot of people would probably bet the same. But here’s the better question. Without your college degree could you still do the job you’re doing now? If you answered with a reasonable yes, you might choose to agree with me when I say that college degrees are more a formality than an actual education. Those four years taught me a lot about life and slowly weened me into the real world, but aside from that, the skills I use most are the skills I learned outside the classroom.

Just recently a client asked me to write a White Paper to market one of their products. After I answered with a confident “Sure! I’ll do it!” I realized I knew nothing more about a white paper other than the color and material it should be on. With the magic of Google and the determination to show them I knew what I was doing, I taught myself in one weekend what 1/3 of a semester in college might have been spent on.

Don’t get me wrong, I wouldn’t trade in any of my years spent on formal education for the world. Even if I took more from 6th grade recess, 11th grade caferteria conversations and freshman socials than I did from the classroom–it was well worth it. My formal education allowed me the time to grow into who I am today and instilled in me the core concepts of learning that I continue to apply, but my self-education carries the most value to me. Maybe what I love the most is that we’re all our own teachers now. While we are beyond the times of pop quizes and exams, the true test is whether you continue pushing yourself even when you know there’s no report card or bachelors degree at the end of the road…just personal pride. And, well, maybe that’s more than enough…